“I really admire your faith, you remind me so much of Job.”
This is a sentiment I’ve heard expressed in one form or the other many times in my 11 years of living with lupus. I get it, and am deeply humbled and appreciative of the compliment. I personally have found several nuggets of encouragement in the book of Job and refer to it often but there is a portion of the story that forever breaks my heart… the children of Job.
A Gust Of Wind
While he was still speaking, yet another messenger came and said, “Your sons and daughters were feasting and drinking wine at the oldest brother’s house, when suddenly a mighty wind swept in from the desert and struck the four corners of the house. It collapsed on them and they are dead, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!” Job chapter 1 verses 18-19
Job had seven sons and three daughters and in one fell swoop a gust of wind caused the house to collapse while they were all partying; none of them survived.
How many can relate to that? Going about regular life and then boom your whole world changes and your future hopes and dreams are literally crushed?
What do you do?
What did Job do?
Curse God and Die
Life can get real tough sometimes. We see it all throughout Job and the many things he suffered through. We see it in the headlines and the lives of those around us. Sadly, we also experience this ourselves. When reading Job we have the benefit of hindsight and so it is quite easy to pass judgement upon Job’s wife and friends for their hasty counsel.
His wife said to him, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!” Job chapter 2 verse 9.
Bear in mind she was not just a bystander but would have been experiencing the loss right alongside him. Their children, old enough to invite each other to their various homes, had all perished. Ten lives, ten sets of memories, ten vessels of potential, all gone. Why would she want to continue living?
Have you ever been there? Your entire world appears to be over and so you no longer see the point of continuing on? Many of us have slammed head first into breaking point tragedies and unlike reading the book of Job we don’t know how our stories will end.
Double What You Had
The Lord blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the former part. He had fourteen thousand sheep, six thousand camels, a thousand yoke of oxen and a thousand donkeys.And he also had seven sons and three daughters. Job chapter 42 verses 12 - 13
The Bible tells us that not only did Job receive from Yahweh double what he lost, he also received seven more children.
Understand that Job never received back the children that had died; he and his wife raised a whole new family.
Do you think that there was ever a second when upon looking at their second set of offspring they forgot, got over or dismissed the existence of their first group of children?
Celebrating a new blessing brings joy to the heart but does not in any way negate the value of what was lost. Even when you have received far more than you had previously there will always be a part of you that remains connected to it.
When you see someone take a moment to pause as they are embark on a new marriage, a new job or a migration journey, when you see a flicker of sadness as they gaze at their rainbow baby or listen to their loved ones retell stories having just been discharged from the hospital or sign a lease agreement having just received an inheritance, understand that they are processing an entire section of the scenario that is completely unknown to you.
They Will Never Return
In my journey of sickness and suffering I have been hospitalised more than 30 times, I have flatlined on a bed in the emergency room, I have missed birthdays, vacations, school events, I have been unable to work, I have been unable to drive, I have been unable to carry on a conversation. Presently I am physically disabled and whilst I am quite functional there are many things that I can no longer do with ease and many I can no longer do at all.
I have been abundantly blessed and am eternally grateful for every single time I have returned home from the hospital however I am grateful and grieving. I grieve for all the time I’ve lost with my family due to being physically and mentally absent. I grieve for the simplest of things I can no longer do on my own. I grieve for the many times my children have had to hear ‘No, mommy can’t manage’. I grieve the dreams I had growing up of the type of woman, wife and mother I would become.
I have a lot to live for and am looking forward to many years of life with family and friends but that which was lost, my own version of the first children of Job will never be returned to me.
Danelle M. Pinnock first emerged as a writer when she began chronicling her journey with God, through a debilitating sickness. Her authentic reflections provided encouragement to many and resulted in her first publication “31 Day Devotional- Quiet Time.”
This full time homemaker, a proud Jamaican, lives in Kingston with her husband Raul and their two children Levi and Zhuri. Along with her freelance writing, she is a worship leader at her church where her husband, a cancer survivor, serves as a deacon.
Follow her on Instagram @danellewritesstuff to learn how God guides a woman with a background in Chemistry, Business Management and Public Health to skillfully pen His methods and His ways through sickness, marriage and parenting.